New Driver and New Parent

With every milestone of my oldest child, I am reminded that I am a New Parent.

Tyler got his learner's permit not long ago.

My first thought was, "I have never taught anyone to drive! How am I supposed to teach him to drive?!?!"

Every time we get in the car, I'm not sure who is more scared - Tyler or me. (As long as we don't count Shane and Bailey in the backseat)

The first time he got in the car and looked to me for direction, I went blank. All of a sudden, all of these little things that you have to do every time you get in a car started overwhelming me. Check mirrors, adjust seats, look over your shoulder, turning the car, watching out for pedestrians, watching out for other cars, and of course - always wearing a seatbelt. Okay, so maybe they are all not so little.

I had him drive around in circles in the parking lot of a playground where there was no one for miles, then we ventured out into the neighborhood where for 30 minutes, we drove in circles. I started to gain some confidence as I'm sure he did as well.

The next week, Troy decided to take him out. I instructed him only to stay in the neighborhood because I didn't think Tyler was ready to venture out. I'm sure it was because I wasn't ready. When they arrived home, I took Tyler out to go to the store with me. On the way there, we practiced changing lanes - again, another skill that seems to me much more difficult than I realized. I told him to get into the right hand lane, but first he needed to speed up to get past the bus. Before I could finish my sentence, he was changing lanes INTO the bus. Luckily the bus started honking and I was able to grab the wheel and get us out of the way.

The following week, he started to drive us home every day. I think he is now up to hitting four or five curbs...I've lost count.

That next weekend, we went out to drive again. This time, as we came up onto a stoplight, a firetruck was turning right. It was one of those GIANT firetrucks that needs two drivers. As they turned right, the back end of their firetruck clipped the front right fender and bumper of the car. And then - the firetruck continued to drive away. Tyler and I both had the same thought at the same time, "Was that Tyler's fault???" I instinctively started to snap at Tyler and then realized, as the truck continued to drive away that this was a good learning lesson in defensive driving and also - Was I supposed to report a fire truck for a hit and run???

Again, I'm not sure who was more freaked out - Tyler or me. We were able to pull into a parking lot and assess the damages. We talked about the accident and then went through the process of tracking down the fire truck and filing a police report. It turned out to be a great learning lesson for him - but one neither of us would want to go through again.

Luckily, there are professional driving schools that he will be able to go through so it does not fall entirely on our shoulders, but I still feel inadequate as a parent. Anytime your first child reaches a milestone such as this, we never quite know what to do. I like to reach for the handbook, oh wait - There isn't one! I like to think I can remember back to when I learned how to drive - but it was way to long ago and it pains me to admit that.

It is also these moments that I appreciate Tyler's patience with me as a new parent. With your first child, you are ALWAYS a new parent. From the moment they enter your life until you leave this earth. He always hits those milestones first - ones that I am not always ready for, but I do the best I can with what I have been taught from my own parents.

Hopefully by the time the other two get to these milestones, I REMEMBER what I have learned from teaching Tyler. Parenting is always about learning from mistakes, doing the best we can, and using Love as a guide. I only hope that my children see through my imperfections and know that I truly love them.

So, although each milestone makes me a New Parent, all over again, there is no better joy I have then experience the first milestones with Tyler as they are just as new for me as they are for him.